Wednesday, June 10, 2009

this post is not a post, or an update

we like to talk about how transforming change is.
compare growth to the change a caterpillar endures to become a butterfly.
like it's all beautiful. magic. poetry.
but some parts of growth and change are really hard.
sure, the final stages, when that beautiful butterfly stretches its wings out to the sky for the first time, are beautiful.
but what we get to see is only the end.
what happens inside that cocoon is a mystery.
what must happen to that caterpillars body to change into something so amazingly intricate, delicate and wonderous?
whatever it is, i imagine it must involve some sort of pain.
it has to.
i mean, all change has painful parts, doesn't it?
that little marching caterpillar, does it have an idea of what is to come?
and if it does, does it go into that little world, willingly, so it can transform into what it is to be - a newly winged beauty?
or does it fight and kick and resist this change, knowing it will leave behind its little legged world?
i have a feeling it goes willingly.
to fly.

i like to think these cocoon days i find myself in are just that.
days of cocooning, changing, growing, and awaiting with patience the day when the growing pains of change are over, and my new wings are strong, and colourful, and ready to stretch for a new world.
i know i just have to be patient.
you cannot rush change.
i can't.
this time anyway.


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